Exposing And Changing Your Inner Beliefs

Put your beliefs outside yourself Review some past situations in which you were clobbered and try to determine why you reacted as you did. A good exercise is to remove the situation from your mind and put it on paper. Use the ABC concept, and follow these steps:

1. Expose Your Beliefs

• Identify the activating event: for example, you were called to your boss’s office: someone tells you your clothes don't match; or you were wrong about something.

• Identify the belief you brought to the situation: I’m being reprimanded; I`m unsure of my clothing selection; I must always be right.

• Identify the consequences of your belief: stress before you’re even told why you were called to the office; anger that you didn't dress correctly; anxiety that you made a mistake.

Once you've reviewed your beliefs, step up to the plate and take positive action.

2. Take Positive Action

• Dispute your belief the boss could be wrong; my clothes are clean and well pressed-if the color's off I’ll simply coordinate better; no one can always be right.

• Try to adopt a less stressful response: What could have gone wrong? How do I explain it? What responsibility is mine? I'll get a book or lesson on clothing coordination so it won’t happen again; let’s review it again so I’ll see where my process was off the mark.

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